Yourself and societal norms, yourself and your family, yourself and your partner, yourself and your profession…
These are the dilemmas we so often get stuck in throughout life.
Sometimes in the decisions we have to make, sometimes in the steps we want to take, and sometimes in the things we wish to retreat from, we find ourselves caught between what we truly want and what other labels expect from us.
“I want it this way, but what will society say?”
“I want to go here, but what will my family think?”
“I don’t want to do this, but what will my partner think of me?”
“I want to dress like this, but it doesn’t suit my profession…”
Is there anyone among us who has never thought at least one of these sentences?
If there is, I would truly like to meet them.
Of course, we live in a society that requires rules, conditions, and shared norms for life to flow harmoniously. These are important for maintaining social order.
But do we have to live every moment of our personal lives strictly according to those expectations?
While trying to conform to these rules, the expectations of others, and the labels imposed on us, what happens to our authentic self—the one that quietly gets lost in the process?
Often, we get stuck between ourselves and the demands of the outside world.
And when our strength runs out, we abandon our essence and surrender to the molds placed upon us.
Yet what we feel then is not the peaceful relief of conformity, but the deep, disorienting ache of drifting further away from who we truly are.
The Inner Battle And The Moment Of Surrender
With this feeling—and all the other labels imposed upon us—we fight a silent inner battle for a while.
We remind ourselves to be strong:
“No, it must be what I want. This is my life, and I should live it as I wish.”
In that moment, we feel powerful—brave enough to challenge the entire world.
But as time passes and the struggle continues, exhaustion sets in.
Our endurance wears thin until one day we whisper, “Enough. I give up.”
And at that moment of surrender, a storm of emotions fills our hearts.
At first, there is anger and sorrow—toward society, our family, the pressures around us, and every mold that told us how we “should be.”
Because we fought hard… but we lost.
And in the disappointment of defeat, we realize that our battle was never truly with those external molds.
The real conflict has always been with the invisible structure within us that limits and suppresses who we are.
When Anger Turns Inward
Over time, we begin to understand where this anger really points.
It’s not toward the world or others—it’s toward ourselves.
Toward the self that gave up the fight.
The self that couldn’t speak, couldn’t act, couldn’t resist.
We ask,
“Why couldn’t I fight?”
“Why didn’t I do what I wanted?”
“Why did I give up?”
And with every question, we punish ourselves a little more.
We long to be strong, yet blame ourselves for not showing strength.
This internal contradiction drains us.
And the sadness that follows is not an ordinary sorrow—it’s the sadness of awareness.
“I couldn’t be myself.”
“I couldn’t follow my truth.”
“I gave in.”
“I wasn’t strong enough.”
And so, we mourn the silenced part of us—the lost voice that once dared to be real.
The Silent Yet Unbroken Self
Perhaps the part we mourn never truly disappeared.
Maybe it simply fell silent—retreating deeper each time we silenced our own needs.
It still waits, quietly, for us to listen.
To remember what it feels like to be unapologetically ourselves.
To say “This is who I am,” to draw our boundaries, to stand our ground.
Maybe that authentic self was never gone—just buried beneath layers of noise and expectation.
And the moment we pause to listen, we can still hear it breathe.
Existing Without Losing Yourself
Maybe the real challenge isn’t to fight society at all—
but to exist within it without losing yourself.
Sometimes that means saying “no.”
Sometimes “this is how I want it.”
And sometimes, “I don’t know yet, but I want to try.”
The true self lives and breathes within these brave sentences.
Perhaps being strong isn’t about constant resistance.
Maybe it’s about having the courage to begin again—without fear, without guilt—
even after giving up.
The Final Question
After all the struggles—with yourself, the labels, and society—only one question remains:
“Where are you in all of this?”
Maybe the real journey doesn’t start with rebellion or approval—
but with finding yourself again amidst the noise.
Because every label fades, every expectation shifts,
but the voice that whispers “This is me”
is the one that never truly disappears. ✨