Children sometimes struggle to find the right words to express their emotions. When they feel sad, angry, confused, or simply tired, they may have difficulty explaining what they are experiencing. In some cases, when they do not want to go to school, when a request is denied, or when they feel unwell, they may avoid expressing their feelings directly. Instead, they often turn to a familiar phrase: “My stomach hurts.” Many of us, as adults, have used this same expression at least once during our own childhood. What appears to be a simple physical complaint is often much more than that. It is, in many instances, the body’s way of expressing emotions that the child is not yet able to articulate.
What Are Psychosomatic Symptoms?
A young child may not yet have learned the words to accurately express their emotions. Even when they try to communicate how they feel, they may not find someone around who listens and understands them. In such situations, phrases like “My stomach hurts,” “I’m sick,” or “I’m in pain” tend to be heard more often. These expressions are the physical manifestations of the child’s emotional state. These manifestations are what we define as “psychosomatic symptoms.”
Childhood and the Expression of Emotions
Psychosomatic symptoms can occur not only in children but also in adults. For example, intense stress may manifest as stomach cramps, and suppressed anger may result in muscle pain. However, these symptoms can present differently during childhood. At an early age, it can sometimes be difficult for children to accurately express their emotions and regulate them. A child may struggle to communicate negative experiences from school, their social environment, or inner world with clear statements such as “I feel anxious” or “I am unhappy.” Instead, they may express their anxiety through physical sensations like stomach tightness, a lump in the throat, or restless sleep. When such signs are observed, it is important to pay attention and address the issue carefully.
How Should Parents Interpret This Situation?
When parents encounter such a problem but fail to observe the situation adequately or assess it in a healthy manner, they may interpret the child’s behavior as manipulative or attention-seeking. While this interpretation may be valid in certain cases, generalizing it can be misleading. More often, it indicates that the child has not yet learned to express their emotions through other means.
Psychosomatic Symptoms
Among the physical symptoms frequently observed in childhood that lack a clear medical explanation are abdominal pain, nausea, headaches, loss of appetite, and changes in toileting habits. Naturally, it would not be accurate to claim that these symptoms are always psychological. However, when medical evaluations do not offer a clear cause, it becomes necessary to carefully consider the child’s emotional state.
When we look at research conducted in this area, it becomes clear that stress experienced during childhood has a direct impact on the immune, digestive, and nervous systems (Campo & Fritsch, 1994; van der Kolk, 2014). In particular, as emotional support within the parent-child relationship diminishes, stress-related physical complaints in children tend to increase. It is crucial to interpret these symptoms as signals and to make a conscious effort to understand what the child is experiencing.
So How Can We Understand These Signals?
When the situation is recognized, you will realize that the clues have actually been right in front of you from the very beginning. Recurring nausea every morning before going to school, abdominal pain that intensifies when the child is alone, or headaches that appear after a conflict with an adult can all be considered among these clues. In fact, each of these signals points to the emotional burden the child carries but cannot yet put into words.
Conclusion
The key point to keep in mind here is to avoid interpreting these symptoms as the child “being difficult” or “trying to manipulate their parents.” Instead, it is important to recognize them as a form of communication and to approach the situation with that awareness. Even before children learn to speak, they try to convey something. Although they may not be able to express themselves with words, they sometimes communicate through their behaviors, play, body language, or simply their gaze. Therefore, parents, caregivers, and teachers need to listen not only to the child’s verbal expressions but also to their bodily signals.
If the root of the problem is not addressed, the child may feel misunderstood, which can lead to the physical symptoms becoming chronic. A supportive environment, safe channels of communication, and an open attitude toward understanding emotions can help reduce these somatic complaints in the child’s inner world. Sometimes, a simple phrase like “I understand you” can be more effective than many medicines.
References
Van der Kolk, B. (2014). The body keeps the score: Brain, mind, and body in the healing of trauma. New York, 3.
Campo, J. V., & Fritsch, S. L. (1994). Somatization in children and adolescents. Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, 33(9), 1223–1235. https://doi.org/10.1097/00004583-199411000-00003