In a recent episode of AI Confidential with Hannah Fry that I watched on the BBC, a service called “You, Only Virtual,” developed by tech entrepreneur Justin Harrison, was featured. According to this service, Justin uses artificial intelligence to fulfill one of the deepest desires of people experiencing loss: the wish to speak one last time with the person they have lost. He explains that when his mother was diagnosed with terminal cancer, he recorded her voice before her passing and continued to “talk” with her as if they were having phone conversations. He claims this helped him cope significantly with the grieving process. Later, he founded a company that gave artificial intelligence a new direction. This raises an important question: Can artificial intelligence improve the grieving process?
By using AI technology, we can record the voices of our loved ones while they are still alive and use this data after their death. In such a way, we can simulate phone conversations with the deceased, almost as if they were still there, engaging in everyday dialogue. We can share updates about our lives and receive supportive responses, potentially easing the burden of grief we carry—or at least, we gain the possibility of doing so. But can artificial intelligence truly benefit individuals going through a difficult grieving process? Let’s explore this together.
Stages of Grief
First, understanding the stages of grief can help us make sense of the process we are experiencing. One of the most widely used models is the Five Stages of Grief Model introduced by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross (1969). According to this model, individuals who experience loss first go through denial. In this stage, there is a rejection or resistance toward the loss, death, and the reality of what has happened. This denial is followed by anger. The individual may feel anger toward themselves, others, the external world, fate, or even God.
The third stage is bargaining. Here, the individual mentally negotiates in the hope of reversing the loss, often blaming themselves or others. The fourth stage is depression, during which the person confronts the reality of the loss and experiences intense sadness, withdrawal, hopelessness, and various emotional states. When this stage is processed in a healthy way, the final stage begins: acceptance. At this point, the individual starts to accept the loss and learns to continue life while carrying the pain within.
An important note is that these stages are not necessarily linear, nor does everyone experience all of them. Individuals may move back and forth between stages or experience them differently (Kübler-Ross & Kessler, 2005).
Can Artificial Intelligence Help Us Process These Stages?
One of the most significant contributions of artificial intelligence to psychology may be the ability to record the voices of our loved ones and engage in “real” conversations with them. Many individuals who experience loss cognitively understand that the deceased will not return. However, due to emotional attachment, it can be extremely difficult to detach from the person they have lost.
One of the core challenges of grief is this contradiction: knowing that the person is physically gone while still feeling emotionally connected to them. Many grieving individuals long to speak with their loved ones one last time, say goodbye, hear their voices, and share life updates with them again. However, due to the physical reality of loss, this has traditionally been impossible—or perhaps this is now changing.
With the current advancements in artificial intelligence, it is now possible to “talk” to the deceased again, hear their voices, and receive verbal responses. This may help fill, at least partially, the emotional void we feel and make the pain of loss more manageable. However, because this also maintains the sense of emotional closeness and attachment, it may interfere with fully reaching the stage of acceptance.
Long-Term Psychological Implications
What might be the long-term psychological effects of this technology? If we continue to communicate with deceased loved ones through AI after their death, how does this affect the grieving process? Are we truly processing grief, or merely postponing it?
At present, we do not have clear answers to these questions. As technology advances and more comprehensive research and observations are conducted, we may gain a better understanding. However, it seems likely that, at least in the short term, hearing the voices of loved ones one last time could be a comforting and healing experience for many people.
Conclusion
Artificial intelligence introduces a new dimension to the grieving process—one that blurs the boundary between presence and absence. While it may offer temporary comfort and emotional support, it also raises important psychological questions about closure, acceptance, and the nature of letting go. Ultimately, the impact of this technology will depend not only on how it is developed, but also on how it is used and integrated into the deeply human experience of loss.
References
Kübler-Ross, E. (1969). On Death and Dying. New York, NY: Macmillan.
Kübler-Ross, E., & Kessler, D. (2005). On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Loss. New York, NY: Scribner.