You put on your headphones and go for a walk. As you look around, thousands of thoughts cross your mind… Sometimes you see your past, sometimes your future, and sometimes you see yourself where you want to be—at different tables or in another country. Sometimes you think about things that make you anxious, and sometimes you don’t want to leave the dream you’ve created.
What does dreaming mean to you? Or let’s put it this way: have you ever lost track of time while daydreaming? How often do you get lost in dreams you never want to wake up from? Do you ever feel completely detached from reality while dreaming? Have you ever gotten so caught up in a dream that you suddenly tried to bring it into reality? Have you ever found yourself talking to yourself inside a fantasy? Have you ever stopped and asked yourself, “What am I doing right now?”
Everyone has experienced these things at least once in life. But what distinguishes Maladaptive Daydreaming from normal daydreaming?
Do you find it difficult to snap out of your daydream and return to reality?
What Is Maladaptive Daydreaming?
Sigmund Freud was one of the first to address the phenomenon of daydreaming in the history of psychology. Freud viewed daydreaming as a form of expression for desires and repressed emotions deep within the human mind (Freud, 1900). Carl Jung later emphasized the importance of imagination and fantasy in individual development (Jung, 1959).
Daydreaming has been explained in many ways. However, some individuals daydream for hours beyond what is considered typical and repeatedly relive detailed fantasies they have created. Within these fantasies, individuals may assume different identities and build complex internal narratives.
The most distinctive criterion separating this from ordinary daydreaming is that it causes individuals to neglect responsibilities in daily life and socially isolate themselves in order to sustain these fantasies. Eli Somer was the first to describe this phenomenon and named it Maladaptive Daydreaming (Somer, 2002).
So, What Makes These Dreams So Attractive?
1. Sense Of Control
There are many things we cannot control in real life. In dreams, however:
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Who we are
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What we say
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How the other person behaves
is entirely in our hands.
This makes dreams feel safe.
2. The Need For Understanding And Approval
In dreams:
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Our sentences are not left unfinished,
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We are not misunderstood,
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Reactions unfold exactly as we want them to.
Emotional needs that feel unmet in real life are fulfilled in fantasy.
3. The Ideal Self
Dreams often present a version of ourselves that is:
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More courageous,
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Clearer,
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More valued.
This imagined self is very close to who we aspire to become.
4. The Exhaustion Of Real Life
Dreams are not attractive because we simply escape into them; they are attractive because enduring reality can feel overwhelming.
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Exhaustion
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Disappointments
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Loneliness
draw the mind inward.
Dreams are sometimes not the place we run away to, but the place we cling to.
When Do These Dreams Cease To Be Innocent?
1. The Difficulty Of Leaving A Dream
The problem is not entering the dream; it is the difficulty of returning from it.
2. Postponing Real Life
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Tasks that need to be completed,
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Relationships,
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Responsibilities
begin to quietly fade into the background.
3. Creating Conscious Conditions For Entering A Dream
The desire to be alone, using music as a trigger, repetitive rituals, and specific routines may become intentional gateways into fantasy.
4. Post-Daydreaming Emotion
Instead of relief, individuals may feel:
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Guilt,
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Emptiness,
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An even stronger desire to escape.
When fantasy begins to replace lived experience, it must be recognized.
Maladaptive Daydreaming And Psychological Disorders
A critical point must be emphasized:
Maladaptive Daydreaming is not currently an official diagnosis.
However, it frequently co-occurs with certain psychological difficulties:
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Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD): Individuals with MD show significantly higher rates of inattention symptoms compared to control groups.
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Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD): MD appears more strongly associated with obsessive thinking than with ritualistic behaviors.
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Dissociation: The symptom of “absorption” (intense focus and detachment from the external world) is strongly linked to MD (Bigelsen et al., 2016).
Is Maladaptive Daydreaming A Psychological Syndrome?
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A Clinical Phenomenon: Research suggests that MD may represent an understudied mental health condition with distinct characteristics.
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Official Status: Although it is not included in diagnostic manuals such as the DSM-5, some researchers argue that it is clinically distinct from OCD and ADHD and may warrant separate classification.
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Key Distinction: What differentiates MD from normal daydreaming is that fantasies become uncontrollable, cause distress, and impair daily functioning.
Returning From Dreams
Daydreaming is one of the most natural refuges of the human mind. Sometimes it is for rest; sometimes it is for endurance. However, when Maladaptive Daydreaming causes a person to live more intensely in fantasy than in reality, an unnoticed distance forms.
Without realizing it, individuals may begin postponing life itself.
Perhaps what matters is not silencing dreams, but understanding where they are calling us from. Because no matter how far the mind wanders, life always waits at the place to which we must return.