You likely know Aesop’s Fables; specifically, the story of the fox who, unable to reach the grapes hanging from a high branch, walks away saying, “They were sour anyway.” What the fox did was not merely an act of self-deception, but a complex mental maneuver designed to protect its psychological well-being. In our daily lives, we are not so different from that fox. When we are rejected from a job we desperately wanted, we might say, “The salary was too low anyway,” or when we eat a huge slice of cake while on a diet, we rationalize it by saying, “I walked a lot today, I deserved it.” Why does our mind need these excuses? In Social Psychology, this phenomenon is called Cognitive Dissonance, and it is essentially the result of our desire to appear consistent and maintain internal peace. In this article, we will examine why we believe our own lies and how we manage this psychological tension.
The human mind seeks harmony between its beliefs and behaviors. According to the theory proposed by social psychologist Leon Festinger in 1957, when a belief we hold contradicts a behavior we perform, we experience a state of mental discomfort (psychological tension). This discomfort is so aversive that, to escape it, the individual unconsciously seeks to change either their beliefs or their behaviors. Since changing behavior (e.g., quitting smoking or not eating that cake) is often difficult, we usually choose the path of least resistance: we change our thoughts.
The most striking evidence for this comes from a classic experiment conducted by Festinger and Carlsmith in 1959. Researchers asked participants to perform an incredibly boring and meaningless task (like turning wooden pegs for an hour). Afterward, these participants were asked to tell the next participants waiting outside that the experiment was “actually very fun and interesting.” In other words, they were asked to lie. In exchange for this lie, one group was paid $20, while the other group was paid only $1.
When asked later if they truly enjoyed the task, a surprising result emerged: the group that received $20 admitted the task was boring. However, the group that received only $1 claimed the task was “not that bad, and actually had some fun aspects.” Why? Because the group that got $20 had a valid external justification for lying; they took the money, told the lie, and no dissonance remained. But for the $1 group, the situation was different. Lying for a mere dollar seemed foolish and inconsistent with their self-image. To eliminate this internal conflict, they had only one option left: to believe their own lie. They bent their reality to justify their action—an example of internal justification.
In daily life, this mechanism kicks in especially when we make difficult decisions. For example, imagine buying a very expensive phone. Immediately after the purchase, a doubt might gnaw at you: “Did I spend too much money unnecessarily?” To suppress this feeling of post-decision dissonance (or buyer’s remorse), you suddenly start reading articles about how high-quality that brand is, or you actively look for flaws in competitor brands. Your goal is not just to praise the phone, but to convince yourself that you made the right choice.
A similar situation is observed in groups or clubs with difficult initiation processes. The more effort and hardship you endure to join a group (e.g., a tough internship or a difficult exam), the more value you place on that group once you are in. The mind cannot easily accept the dissonance of asking, “Did I suffer for nothing?” Instead, it concludes, “I suffered, but it was worth it; this is an amazing place.”
Cognitive Dissonance is fundamentally a defense shield that protects our ego. It shields us from the pain of facing our mistakes and the shame of appearing inconsistent. However, this shield can sometimes prevent us from seeing the truth. As a psychology student or an individual curious about human behavior, being aware of this mechanism gives us great power. The next time you find yourself defending a mistake or trying to rationalize an irrational decision, stop and think: Are you truly right, or are you just trying to silence that uncomfortable voice inside you? Growth and change begin exactly where the excuses end.