We sometimes feel that time passes very quickly, and sometimes that it passes very slowly. A 24-hour span can be experienced differently even by individuals living under the same roof. When we are heading to a place we love or waiting for a job interview, hours feel like seconds. But when we look at something for the last time or return from a wonderful holiday, even an hour can feel like a year. Why is that? How can something so objective and measurable be experienced in such different ways?
In fact, we are all beings dissolving in our routines. We shape our time and its objectivity according to our weekly or daily plans. Many of us eagerly fill our Fridays and Saturdays when making weekly plans, but we leave Sundays rather empty, knowing that we will spend them waiting for Monday. And because we know that waiting makes time go by quickly.
Developmental Psychology and the Flow of Time
This perception does not occur only in adulthood. If we take a broader perspective, even in childhood we could not realize how fast time passed while waiting to grow up. It seemed slow to us, we wanted to grow up as soon as possible. Once we reach adulthood, we realize that now time seems to be slipping away from us. In fact, time is not going anywhere; a year is still 365 days. What changes is our perspective.
This subjective difference is also supported by developmental psychology. According to Erikson’s psychosocial development theory, every stage of our life is shaped around a different conflict or dilemma. For example, in young adulthood the conflict is intimacy vs. isolation, while in middle adulthood it is generativity vs. stagnation. The flow of time thus presents itself to us as a “conflict that must be resolved at every stage of life.” And these stages do not end in adulthood; they continue into old age, until the very end of life. In old age, the conflict to be resolved is integrity vs. despair.
One reason we perceive time differently at every stage is precisely this. In each conflict group, time is not only the hours that pass, but also what need we must meet and where we are heading. To summarize Erikson’s theory, for a child it is to become an adult as soon as possible, for a young adult it is to form bonds, and for the elderly it is to find meaning in their past. In other words, time is not only an external measurement but also an internal journey.
Zimbardo’s Time Perspective Theory
Zimbardo’s Time Perspective Theory explains this subjective difference in a more simplified way. As we just said, according to Zimbardo, time does not progress solely according to external measurements. The way we look at it also shapes how we live it.
According to him, some people view the past positively, living with nostalgia and gratitude, while others recall the past with disappointment. These different perspectives affect not only how we perceive time, but also our stress hormones, decisions, and even our happiness. A person with a past-positive orientation experiences their memories as a warm source of security, while for a past-negative person, those memories become an additional burden.
Hedonistic individuals, on the other hand, may fail to devote time to their responsibilities because they focus on enjoying the moment. Future-oriented people are those productive individuals we all know well, yet they miss the present while constantly planning ahead.
So, we return to the beginning. For Zimbardo, time is not only about our age or the routines that shape us. It is also about which window we look through at life and what we feel as we look. Some people remain in the past, living within their memories; others savor the present moment; still others constantly think of the future. And it is precisely these differences that make even the same 24 hours feel like days to some and seconds to others.
Existential Psychology and the Awareness of Time
In his book Sein und Zeit, Heidegger states that human existence is limited by time. He says that we are all “thrown” into the world as individuals and that we know one day death will come. He adds that this awareness is the most determining factor of life.
When we know that we are not infinite, every action we take becomes valuable. At the same time, the anxiety this brings plays a liberating role: it reminds us that life will end one day anyway and emphasizes that we must focus on what is truly important in the present.
Existential theorists such as Yalom, on the other hand, emphasize that when individuals confront the thought of death, they develop a stronger drive to live more consciously. This drive and the awareness it brings are often used in therapy processes. For knowing that death will inevitably come does not only burden us with anxiety, it also motivates us to live more consciously and authentically.
Personal Perspective on Time and Meaning
In recent years, I too have begun to notice these themes in my own relationship with time. In a new place, with new people, each day felt longer than 24 hours; an endless stretch of time. Every street, every new habit left a trace in my mind.
As time passed and I grew more accustomed, days began to feel like mere minutes. It became a concept slipping from my grasp. That is why I think time is not made up of hours, but of my experiences and my ability to live in the moment. Everything new expands time, while our routines shrink it. Here, it is up to us to choose what we feel. As Heidegger said, this awareness of limitation can be seen as an invitation: to focus on what is valuable, in other words, on the present moment.
In fact, all these differences are not merely causes of anxiety, but opportunities to make life meaningful. Rather than fighting with time and chasing after it, we need to learn to stay in its flow and to swim along with it.
References
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Erikson, E. H. (1950). Childhood and Society. W. W. Norton & Company.
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Zimbardo, P. G., & Boyd, J. (1999). The Time Paradox: The New Psychology of Time That Will Change Your Life. Free Press.
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Heidegger, M. (1962). Being and Time. (Trans. J. Macquarrie & E. Robinson). Harper & Row.
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Yalom, I. D. (1980). Existential Psychotherapy. Basic Books.