Haven’t we all grown tired of the cliché phrases we see around us or on social media lately, such as “You can overcome anything,” “Just believe in yourself and you will succeed,” “Everything is possible,” or “Think positive, and it will be positive”?
But what if everything doesn’t go as expected? Can we really achieve everything? I am sure we all ponder these questions. What are the differences between false positivity and real motivation? Let’s talk about them.
Today, we see the rise of a phenomenon called “toxic positivity” (or sahte/toksik pozitiflik in Turkish) in psychology. This situation is often interpreted as a requirement to stay positive at all times. Consequently, it easily leads to the suppression of negative emotions, as well as ignoring and disregarding them.
Rather than accepting negative emotions—such as fear, disappointment, or sadness—as normal and natural through emotional validation, toxic positivity leads individuals to deny or minimize the existence of these feelings. In psychology, this is defined as emotional suppression. Furthermore, sadness is perceived as weakness, and failure is seen as personal inadequacy.
This attitude can cause people to suppress and ignore their genuine feelings of fear, sadness, disappointment, or anger, which are natural and appropriate—because it creates a perception that even feeling negative is somehow “wrong.” Psychological literature shows that negative emotions are a fundamental necessity for healthy emotional adaptation and psychological resilience; suppressing them, however, can increase the risk of stress, emotional burden, and psychological distress.
Just as every individual has successes, encountering many failures is also inevitable; this is perfectly normal. At the same time, if we believe we can achieve everything, we may begin to view every failure as a personal mistake. This lowers our motivation and sets the stage for disappointment. This situation may also be linked to the “Pollyanna principle” (or positivity bias), which refers to the tendency for people to focus only on positive developments and downplay negative aspects—in other words, the reflex to sweep challenging life events under the rug.
By nature, everyone’s choices, experiences, and expectations from life are vastly different. However, the true face of social media, combined with this imposed false/toxic positivity, eliminates emotional validation.
So, What Can We Do?
Toxic positivity alone is not a way out. An individual’s emotions cannot consist solely of happiness. Every emotion transforms us, and we must allow ourselves to experience every attempt. Accepting our emotions is a healthier option than suppressing them.
The point is not being able to achieve everything; it lies in being able to exist even with our failures. Real motivation primarily comes from acceptance and hard work. Our approach to events should not be focused on negativity; rather, being honest with ourselves as individuals while progressing on our own paths will yield healthier results.
Every individual can derive meaningful outcomes from failures. Ultimately, accepting that we do not have to look positive all the time makes us stronger.
References
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American Psychological Association. (n.d.). Toxic positivity. Psychology Today.
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Ungvarsky, J. (2025). Toxic positivity. EBSCO Research Starters.
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Sonia. (2025). The dark side of positivity: How toxic positivity contributes to emotional suppression and mental health struggles. International Journal of Indian Psychology, 13(2), 1155–1163.
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Pollyanna principle. (n.d.). In Wikipedia.
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Toxic positivity. (n.d.). Wikipedia.