Some idioms such as “We laughed a lot, something bad will definitely happen to us,” “Those who laugh a lot cry a lot” are familiar to all of us. These idioms, which are quite common in our society, suggest that when you are happy, something bad will definitely happen after. The fear of happiness lies behind these idioms.
What is the Fear of Happiness?
The fear of happiness is when people think that they will experience a bad event and be unhappy after an event or experience that makes them happy. People who experience fear of happiness may believe that the feeling of happiness they experience may be a sign of bad events that will develop later. At the same time, they think that the feeling of happiness will bring negative feelings such as sadness and grief. For these people, happiness is not an emotion that should be achieved and targeted, but a situation that should be avoided.
Why Are We Afraid of Being Happy?
There are many reasons why we experience a fear of happiness. We may be afraid of happiness due to the influence of the society we live in or due to personal reasons.
- Living in a Collectivist Culture
Living in collectivist cultures where society is at the forefront rather than the individual can be a factor in our fear of happiness (Deniz, Kurtuluş, and Uzun; 2022). The culture we live in is one of the important factors affecting our relationship with happiness. Since some Eastern cultures have a negative perspective on happiness, people who grow up in that culture may develop a fear of happiness. - Traumas Experienced in Childhood
Traumatic experiences experienced by a person during childhood can cause them to develop a fear of happiness. Studies show traumas as the main reasons for the development of fear of happiness. - Beliefs a Person Has About Happiness
A person’s negative beliefs and assumptions about happiness can be a factor in the development of fear of happiness. For example, a person who thinks that being happy will make them less moral may be afraid of being happy and avoid situations where they will be happy. Other examples of negative beliefs about happiness are that happiness paves the way for negative events, seeking happiness can disturb other people, and seeking happiness is a negative situation. - Family Environment Where the Person is Raised
If happiness is not given importance in the family in which the person is raised, if positive emotions are not rewarded but punished, the person may develop a fear of happiness at an early age. People may try to avoid happiness (Elmas and Çevik, 2024). - Some Psychological Disorders
Although some studies suggest that fear of happiness is related to anxiety, depression, and obsessive-compulsive disorder, a study conducted in our country found that it is related to dissociation – alienation from oneself or the environment.
Which Areas of Your Life Can Fear of Happiness Affect?
Fear of happiness is one of the situations that can significantly affect our lives.
- Life Satisfaction
Fear of happiness has a negative effect on our life satisfaction (Elmas, 2022). Avoiding happy events and refraining from being happy can reduce the life satisfaction you get from our lives. In order to increase our life satisfaction, we need to be happy in our lives. - Psychological Well-Being
Fear of happiness has a negative effect on both subjective and psychological well-being (Sarı and Çakır, 2016). Fear of happiness can make it difficult for us to feel good and achieve psychological well-being. Avoiding happiness can have the opposite effect rather than achieving psychological well-being. - Psychological Resilience
Although some studies say there is no relationship between fear of happiness and psychological resilience, some studies show that there is a relationship (Deniz, Kurtuluş and Uzun, 2022). Avoiding happiness can have a negative effect on your psychological resilience, which can cause you to be more vulnerable to negative events.
How Can You Overcome the Fear of Happiness?
There are some steps you can take to overcome the fear of happiness. It is possible to reduce the avoidance of happiness by taking these steps.
- Review Your Beliefs About Happiness
The beliefs we gave examples of earlier can reinforce the fear of happiness and play a role in its continuation. When you question the accuracy of your beliefs and look at them more objectively, you can see that they are not 100% true. - Try to Incorporate Optimism into Your Life
Fear of happiness is more closely related to pessimism than optimism. The negative expectations we have about events can feed the fear of happiness. Adopting an optimistic perspective can help reduce the fear of happiness.
Conclusion
Although happiness is a feeling that everyone strives to achieve, some people may avoid being happy. This fear, called fear of happiness, is the belief that bad events will occur after happiness and that the person will be unhappy. The culture in which the person is raised is an important factor, but his/her beliefs and family environment may be effective. Fear of happiness can negatively affect a person’s psychological well-being and reduce life satisfaction. Fear of happiness is essentially a fear of bad events and unhappiness that may develop after happiness.
References
- Elmas, İ., & Çevik, Ö. (2024). Fear of Happiness: Description, Causes and Prevention. Current Approaches in Psychiatry, 16(3), 485-493. doi:10.18863/pgy.1348981
- Sarı, T., & Çakır, S. G. (2016). Examining the relationship between fear of happiness and subjective and psychological well-being. Journal of Education and Teaching Research, 5(4), 222-229.
- Deniz, M. E., Yıldırım, H., & Uzun, G. (2022). Investigation of the relationship between fear of happiness and future expectation and psychological resilience in adolescents. Journal of National Education, 51(235), 2397-2416.
- Şibka, D., & Duman, H. (2022). Relationships between some demographic variables and fear of happiness, alexithymia, depression and personality traits in adults. International Journal of Economics Administrative and Social Sciences, 5(1), 40-56.
- Elmas, İ. (2022). Relationship between life satisfaction, cognitive distortions related to relationships and psychological vulnerability with teachers’ fear of happiness. Current Approaches in Psychiatry, 14(Suppl 1), 147-156.